Ninja Toss Preview

To all the chubby chefs of the world: We salute you. You sample your own fare constantly to make sure that it’s perfect for our consumption. You remind us that it’s okay to love food, and that we don’t necessarily have to live off saltines and tap water. And to all the chubby chefs that moonlight as ninjas, as is the case with Nyam from Ninja Toss: Wow. Our reverence is not enough.

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Ninja Toss lets you defeat food gone bad with a portly hero who can fly like an eagle

To all the chubby chefs of the world: We salute you. You sample your own fare constantly to make sure that it’s perfect for our consumption. You remind us that it’s okay to love food, and that we don’t necessarily have to live off saltines and tap water. And to all the chubby chefs that moonlight as ninjas, as is the case with Nyam from Ninja Toss: Wow. Our reverence is not enough.

Ninja Toss is a physics/action game that’s coming soon for the iPad and the iPhone. You play as Nyam, a roly-poly fellow who’d rather prepare and sample onigiri, sushi, and yakitori rather than fight for his life against crazy, anthromorphic bits of the aforementioned food; sometimes, however, we all gotta’ dodge a curve ball.

Ninja Toss

Since distance running and sword fighting aren’t really Nyam’s thing, he needs to find alternative ways to defeat the demon food that wants his blood. The solution: Catapult. Nyam launches himself belly-first, sails through the air, and dive-bombs his enemies to scatter them into chunks of rice and seaweed. He also needs to avoid traps, collect rice grains, and hone the ancestral ninja skills that are still deep inside him.

Ninja Toss is a high-score game, and you can compare your tally with your friends’ attempts. Some power-ups are on-hand to grant you an edge, including rocket boosts, electrical charges, and propeller-topped unicycles that let you putter through the sky with dignity.

Ninja Toss

Ninja Toss arrives on the App Store on November 1. Quick, finish off that serving of inari before it gains intelligence and kills us all.    

In the early aughts, Nadia fell into writing with the grace of a brain-dead bison stumbling into a chasm. Over the years, she's written for Nerve, GamePro, 1UP.com, USGamer, Pocket Gamer, Just Labs Magazine, and many other sites and magazines of fine repute. She's currently About.com's Guide to the Nintendo 3DS at ds.about.com.