Kim Kardashian: Hollywood Review – Celebrity’s a Farce, and This Game Knows It

The Good

Has lively dialogue that's often funny.

Addresses gay relationships without making them a joke.

Lots of tasks to complete.

The Bad

Plays like the majority of

Coolest accessories and clothes are behind paywalls.

Though I once had a regular gig writing about celebrities, I no longer keep up with the Kardashians. Sure, I already know she’s an actress, singer, and a socialite – sort of a Hollywood Kim of All Trades. I know she’s married to Kanye West. I know her dress recently almost fell off at some event or another (or so Google tells me). I know the Paparazzi follows her as keenly as vultures follow a staggering wildebeest. I also know there’s no way on God’s neon-lit Earth that Kim would ever become my BFF and help me launch a modelling career (though surely there’s a demand for chubby corgi-shaped models that barely break 5’0″, right? I gotta believe).

But that’s the fun of video games: We’re thrust into wild fantasies where we slay dragons, and ride across the wild west. And, in the case of Kim Kardashian: Hollywood, we can instantly become besties with the starlet and stand in front of cameras for hours without feeling our morals and self-worth deflate. kardashian_03 Your new Hollywood career kicks off at the So Chic Boutique, where you’re a lowly shirt-folder. You’re about to close, when suddenly Kim kicks in the door and starts babbling about a fashion emergency. You help her out, and to show her gratitude, she takes you under her wing so you can start a modelling career. Kim Kardashian: Hollywood plays like most games that challenge you to build yourself into a celebrity. You climb the social ladder, attend parties and photo shoots, rub shoulders with celebrities, and collect cool fashions. You basically do whatever’s necessary to rise from an E-list schlub to a shining star worthy of Kim’s company.

In other words, nothing is new under the LA sun in Kim Kardashian: Hollywood. And, as you might expect from a free-to-play game, the best clothes and accessories are bought with the game’s hard currency – stars, in this instance.

Thing is, Kim Kardashian: Hollywood knows its premise is silly and stale, but it’s determined to show you a good time anyway. The character dialogue is often hilarious, and there are scenarios that are, frankly, intriguing. For instance, you have a management team to help you get jobs and deal with your public image. When you inevitably attract a hater, your image manager offers to turn the tables by spreading rumors about him. You can agree – revenge is sweet, after all – or you can take the high road. There’s also the matter of dating. Dating helps you get seen, and it’s healthy for networking as well. You can choose a partner of the opposite sex, or the same sex. Gay dating works the same way as heterosexual dating. There’s no jokes, no fanfare. It’s simply, “Do you want to date a guy or a girl?”

I never thought I’d be able to say homosexual relationships are treated respectfully in a free-to-play mobile game with Kim Kardashian’s face on it, but here we are. Gameplay-wise, Kim Kardashian: Hollywood is strictly old hat, but its self-aware humor makes it worth a play if you’re into celebrity-building games. Word of warning: If you see Kim in real life, don’t wave your mobile phone in her face and scream about how you’re actually best friends. That path only leads to pain, child.

Content writer

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
More content