Apple removes Top Grossing Charts from App Store

In a surprising move, Apple announced that it is removing its Top Grossing Chart from the App Store.  From now on, there will only be two top ranking charts – free and paid.   In typical Apple fashion, the company made this move at midnight last night, on the first day of April, without giving anyone any notice.

Apple released the following statement:  “We’ve noticed, as many of you have, that the games in the Top Ranking Lists have not changed in the past year.  We suspect it’s because the game companies in the Top 10 are spending millions of dollars a day to keep their position, but it could just be coincidence.  So, we decided to take the high road and give game companies the opportunity to compete on merit than money.”


It’s unclear what impact this will have on the success of games in the Top Lists like Candy Crush Saga or Clash of Clans, the future of free-to-play games, or the cost per install ad model.  In their S1 released anticipation of going public, King disclosed that they spent $377 million last year on marketing.  

“Surely, we’re disappointed,” a King spokesperson admitted on the condition of anonymity, “but we’re highly confident that Candy Crush Saga will retain its top position because it’s an addictively awesome game.  Though, we do wish Apple made this move a week ago before we went public.”

In other news, Google made an announcement, that it is considering removing its top grossing chart, since the Top 10 games, who also happen to be the top advertisers, have been entrenched in the same position even longer than on the Apple charts.  Google is also considering creating a more rigorous approval process where they take into a consideration whether a game is a clone.

“It’ll require hiring more staff, but heck, we spent $3 billion earlier this year to buy a company that sells a smart thermostat for $250 that no one outside Silicon Valley has ever used,” said a Google spokesperson.  “Besides, 2048 derivatives of 2048 are being released on Google Play every 2048 minutes.  This is getting ridiculous.”

**APRIL FOOLS! Now that April 1st has come and gone, we just want to be clear — this was our little April Fool’s joke for 2014.

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