I Love Fur has everything we ever wanted in the fur-petting simulator we didn’t know we wanted. Mythical creatures with fur that glows and makes sounds like “swerrsh” and “blalala.” Uncomfortably close petting proximity, to the point where we can almost smell the Porcupineapple. Extensive biographies that tell us each creature’s age, allergies, and political party.
If any of this is what you’re look for in your next fur-petting simulator, we recommend just downloading I Love Fur now. It’s an experience that can’t be properly captured in words and attempting to do so would only result in unnecessary spoilers. Yes, you can spoil the fur-petting experience. Telling you that there will be swerrshing is already too much.
For those of you who insist upon more deets before sacrificing your precious megs: there are currently seven different fantastical animals for you to stroke and befriend, ranging from the Space Cucumber to the Bipolar Bear. Each has a preferred petting method and will request it when you first meet: Space Cucumber, for instance, asks that you push his hair-tentacles the opposite direction they are facing. If you are a skilled enough petter, you’ll earn the animal’s friendship and a letter of recommendation to any other animal you wish to pet. Once you’re friends with a creature, you can visit it anytime for freeform petting sessions and the occasional word of praise for your technique.
You’ll also unlock that animal’s biography, which is as joy-inducing as the soothingly tactile petting itself. One animal is allergic to winter; another can only eat supernovas that are less than 100 seconds old. Again, we don’t want to tell you these things, but you’re forcing them out of us like we forced recommendation letters out of pettingly placated creatures.
If the current seven animals aren’t enough fur-rubbing goodness for you (you monster), there are future updates planned, with a Yeti waiting in whatever batter’s box style holding square contains the not-yet-ready-to-pet creatures. A Yeti seems a bit tame compared to a Porcupineapple, but we’re sure developers Damjan Cvetkov-Dimitrov and Nina Geometriev will find a way to make it the greatest thing we’ve ever pretended to touch.