Bizango Blast is great in theory, but terrible in execution

When Bizango Blast was first described to me, the phrase “first-person shooter version of Angry Birds” was used, which naturally piqued my interest. The fact that the game was built with the Unreal Engine made it even more fascinating. Was I going to see some crazy mix of Angry Birds and Infinity Blade, except from a first-person perspective? The short answer is “No. Not at all.” Here’s the long answer.

The game is a physics puzzler/shooter that features the same basic premise as Angry Birds: players have to shoot own structures in order to destroy specific targets (which, in this case, are strange satellite robot thingees instead of thieving pigs). There’s a little bit of a story here, about a race of starfish-like creatures called the Lonies being invaded by an unknown enemy who happens to use the satellites as foot soldiers or something (it’s never really explained all that well); as a result, players control a stationary turret from a first-person perspective to shoot the darn things and the structures they’re sitting on/hiding behind.

The biggest problem is that everything about the gameplay is clumsy at best. The first-person perspective is actually presented from a slight angle, which makes lining up a shot incredibly difficult because it’s tough to tell just where the nose of the gun is pointing. The true aim is only shown when players indicate they’re ready to fire and then have to select the power for their shot; the problem is that the cannon can’t be moved by this point.

The actual physics don’t always work reliably, either. Objects sometimes float in the air when there isn’t anything around to hold them up. Shots will occasionally deal no damage to the structures/objects they strike (or just pass straight through them). And the lack of predictable physics makes it maddening to try and protect the Lonies eggs when they start appearing in the middle of maps.

Essentially, the game is never fun to play. It’s just frustrating at the best of times and it tends to feel broken otherwise.

Bizango Blast

Bizango Blast

Visually, the game is… well, the 3D cel-shaded environments are impressive, but they don’t actually look all that great – especially when you compare them to what Chair Entertainment was able to do with the same engine in Infinity Blade. The colors are certainly bright, but the landscapes themselves have pretty rough texture maps and the various in-game items don’t really have any visual appeal.

Bizango Blast is one of those games that feels like it should be a lot better than it is. Basically, the problems can be explained with these three questions (especially the last one). Does it have a cool premise? Absolutely. Is it good-looking? Not really. Is it fun to play? God, no. And that’s about all you need to know about Bizango Blast.